« Previous123456Next »

National Sarcasm Society Crowns a New King - Me!

Did you miss my coronation by the National Sarcasm Society? I'm the new king of sarcasm. Alright, not true - you caught me. But I do give them plenty of examples of sarcasm to use in their promotional materials. On a more serious note, National Sarcasm Society crown notwithstanding, I wanted to share a bit of my very real realization about the power of words when employed to slice and dice like a Ginsu.

As the sands of time seem to have boarded a bullet train lately, I've noticed that my concern over the words I use has dramatically shifted. Whereas I used to be the captain of the "S.W.A.T." (Sarcastic Wit, Atomic Tongue) team, I have now discovered the power of wounding with words. These wounds linger whilst broken bones heal relatively quickly and are soon forgotten.

Think of that, for a second.

If you were to pass from present tense into past tense - and all of us make that transition - then what would remain with the folks you leave behind? Two things, really: your words and your deeds. What you've done and said will linger in the heart and minds of those that are left in the wake. It doesn't matter that you were well-intentioned, either.

So: how will you be remembered? Hopefully not as king of the National Sarcasm Society!

What will echo through the ears of your kids, friends and family when you're a historical figure? You may not want to think of things in such permanent categories, but someone needs to tell it like it is. It may as well be me.

Now, read this next paragraph very carefully. When my dad made the transition from "is" to "was," it was the singularly hardest day of my life. Do you know what made that day such a bleak event? It wasn't the food. That was fantastic. No, the difficulty lay in the fact that I'd left so much unsaid. Here are some things I wish my dad had heard more from me:

• I'm sorry, dad.
• I was wrong.
• I'm proud of you, dad.
• I forgive you, dad - do you forgive me?
• I love your black socks off.

Alright, don't ask - I've no idea what on this Google Earth dad insisted on wearing those hideous black socks. I'm not sure if they were actually navy blue, either. Heck, they could have been white, but really dirty...I wish he'd heard that from me, too. "Change your socks, dad!"

There are plenty of things dad did for us, style just wasn't one of them. He had a wonderful sense of humor, and all the examples of sarcasm that pepper my life and thinking came from his mind. Part of my problem is trying to keep his memory alive with my sharp tongue.

Look, the point of this article is to illustrate that we have only a very brief life under the sun. It's a short opportunity to make the most of our words. Chew on that before you open your flame-thrower full of scathing words and pull the trigger to loose examples of sarcasm that the National Sarcasm Society would wince at.

About the Author

James M. Hussey loves what he does - he works the family business by day and maintains the blog farm at night, when he's not freelancing as an author on Elance as "JamestheJust." His blog farm includes a new site called Themes For Baby Shower, where you can find great ideas on baby shower corsages and other baby shower theme ideas.

kids king crown Q&A

Question:

i didnt get a crown from burger king?!?

i went to burger king today and bought a kids meal. and you know what?! those people didnt give me a crown! i asked for one and they laughed!
should i go back and complain to the manager? should i jump over the counter and grab one myself?
judo: i would like purple!!!
Little rancis: i will sue BK AFTER i get my crown lol
Jax's mommy: i will get you as many whoppers as you want!
Weleda: i am able to speak but not that well. and the person did understand me because he said "ma'am, you dont need a crown. sorry"

Answer:

We make our own.
I 'll make one for you, it'll say "M I S S Y" !
We can be twinsies ! But mine will say "J U D O " !
which color would you like ?

PURPLE IT IS THEN ! ; )

Question:

Why did this happen to me today?

I was so hungry for Burger King, I missed my early bus on
purpose. Then, to my dismay, they don't open now until 8:30,
because the school kids hang out there in the morning, and
yell, cuss, and fight, so now I have no breakfast.

To make matters worse, some girl gave her boyfriend a piece of her cresant, and her mother just happen to be driving by.
So, she gets out of her car, starts cussing, yelling, and screaming the following:

Don't give that boy none of my food I bought for you
He ain't no boy - he's a grown man
he better go get him a job and pay for his own food
I will beat you @#$ if I see you feed another @#$$#$ out here
you better let them white -------feed his grown @##

WHAT A MORNING
RIGHT?

I didn't even get my crown, a hashbrown, a have it your way
or
NUTTEN!!!!

Answer:

that is terrible,and i must add i am glad you are on my contact list,when ever i am having a bad day,i read your questions,and then i can't stop laughing,so i have run to the bathroom before i pee myself,so keep up the funny part of you ,i do appriciate it

Easy Arts & Crafts Kid's Projects: How to make a king's / prince crown for your little guy

Boo Tube: Crown Ghost The Halloween Superstar

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.